The Etrian Odyssey
by bobie23120
Summary: It’s essentially a novelization of sorts to the classic mode of Etrian Odyssey Untold: The Millennium Girl.


**Howdy doo. This is a story I have been thinking about for quite some time. Hope you enjoy.**

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In the small, isolated town of Etria, an underground forest was discovered. The Radha, governors of Etria, issued a proclamation throughout the continent. Any able-bodied adventurer was invited to investigate the forest and explore its depths. But no matter how many came to investigate the dungeon, none gained the renown they sought. As more adventurers tried and failed to conquer it, it came to be known by a new name…

The Yggdrasil Labyrinth.

Meanwhile, in the middle of town, a young man with red hair seemed to be lost.

"…It HAS to be here somewhere… Is this map wrong? No, that can't be. Excuse me, sir? Could you please direct me to the Explorers Guild?"

"…Muh?" Answered a gruff, eyepatched man.

"The.. Explorers Guild… Could you tell me where to find it?"

The man blinked. "You're.. kidding, right? It's… Here. Where you're standing."

"Huh..?" The explorer looked up, only to find a sign that clearly read "Explorers Guild". "Oh… Well, then… Thank you very much for your assistance." He bowed.

(Line break)

"Gaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh…. When are we going to frickin get there?!?!?!"

"Will you shut up Kell?!"

"You shut up! It's not my fault that your stupid horse hurt it's leg! I can barely even see the city from here. My leg hurts, I'm hungry, and I am tired! Now how do you plan on taking responsibility for this- hello?" A horse carriage was hurrying away.

Kell twitched.

"FINE! I DON'T NEED YOUR STUPID GUILD ANYHOW!! I'LL FORM A NEW GUILD, AND IT'LL BE FIFTEEN TRILLION TIMES BETTER THAN YOURS!!!!!!!!"

(Line break)

"So, Callie, what do you think this 'Yggdrasil' place will be like??!

"..I don't know."

"Do you think there will be, like, super big waterfalls, and really hot guys?"

"…I don't know."

"I bet that it will be the most amazing place on earth. What do you think?"

"…I don't know."

"Well, come on, shape up, Etria isn't getting any closer! How far do you think we are, anyway?"

"…I don't know."

(Line break)

"Did you see that guy come in?"

"He's so cute!"

"Do you think he's single?"

"Nah, no luck, see the ring on his finger?"

The man overheard. "Oh, fear not ladies, this ring is naught but an heirloom. Rest assured, I am very much available." He says with a wink.

The ladies are unimpressed.

"So… single, but definitely not subtle..."

"…I'm inclined to say desperate."

The girls laughed.

The man winced. "Heh… Desperate, you say? I think the more appropriate word would be 'daring'…"

One girl chuckled. Yes, I'm sure you're quite the daredevil."

The man looked offended. "I'll have you know that I am constantly risking my life fighting all sorts of beasts and terrors."

The girl snorted. "Yeah right, what's that on your waist? A sword? No, wait, it's a vial! You're no warrior, you're just a medic! Don't you think that's a pretty girly job?"

The man gasped. "Well, to me, there is no nobler profession than that which heals, rather than hurts. Following the path of pleasure rather than pain. Judging by your whip, I'm thinking you're a dark hunter. Pain is all you know."

The woman looked insulted. "Oh, so you think you're hot stuff? Let me tell you this. My guild, Ragnarock, is going to conquer the Yggdrasil Labyrinth, and we'll be the most famous guild around. Have fun with your medicine." She turned to leave. She was right at the doorway when…

"WAIT!"

The girl turned to see the man, obviously sweating, and sputtering. "W-Well you should know that my guild…. Uh… The Etrian Guild, will conquer the Yggdrasil Labyrinth first!"

(Line break)

"Yeah right…. There wouldn't happen to be any guilds already named 'The Etrian' that are hiring, are there?"

The man was sulking along the streets of Etria, stopping in front of a place labeled "The Explorers Guild". "Hey, wait, what am I thinking?! The Yggdrasil Labyrinth?! Am I really going to conquer the planet's most dangerous place just because I had a spat with some random lady?"

"Hey, did you hear about the Lionheart Guild?"

"Hasn't everyone? They only got, like, 8 levels in, and they're already being treated like heroes!"

"They made so much off of monster parts that they just have women throwing themselves at them!"

The man's ears perked. "Women you say… And just 8 levels…. No. NO. It's too dangerous. It's not worth it. Besides, what guild would even want to take a MALE medic… Everyone knows that medics are best suited for women…"

"Excuse me…"

"Huh?" The man turned, only to find two women. One was blonde, and wearing heavy armor. She had a bored expression on her face. The other was slightly shorter than her friend, with short, brown hair, and a beige hat. She held a bow at her side. She had a scarf that covered her mouth, but she seemed to be smiling.

The man's mood instantly improved.

"And how may I help you two lovely ladies?"

The one with the scarf rolled her eyes, but continued to speak. "My name is Harriet, and this is my friend Callie. Could you point us to the direction of the Explorer's Guild?"

The man was confused. "Ummm… It's… directly to your right. By any chance, would you two happen to be explorers looking to conquer the Yggdrasil Labyrinth?"

The scarved woman looked even more confused. "Directly to my… Oh. Callie!! Why didn't you say anything?!"

The bored blond woman spoke. "I don't know."

Harriet looked peeved. "UGH, you're still doing that?!"

The man was confused. "Doing what?"

Harriet looked exasperated. "A few days back, we got into an argument about whether or not you can answer anything with 'I don't know.' I thought it was just a silly spat, but she's been saying 'I don't know' to everything I say!"

The man was even more confused. "Uh… Could I try?"

Harriet nodded.

"Uhhh… Callie, was it?

"I don't know."

"How are you?"

"I don't know."

"Are you going to say 'I don't know' in response to everything I say?"

"I don't know."

"Are you a girl?"

"I don't know."

The man chuckled. "Am I the sexiest man you have ever seen?"

Callie looked grossed out. "I… don't know."

"Do you know anything?"

"I don't know."

The man had an idea. "Well, My name is Vincent. It's very nice to meet you, Callie."

Callie's eyes widened. "I…. I…. It's… nice to meet you too…."

"YES!!! YOU BROKE THE SPELL!!!"

Callie hung her head in shame. "I… I failed…"

Vincent looked sympathetic. "Uhh… Sorry. But in any case, are you two here to explore Yggdrasil?"

Harriet nodded enthusiastically. "Yup! We hear that the Labyrinth is the greatest journey this world has to offer! And we just love adventure, don't we, Callie?"

"…I don-"

"DON'T."

"Hey, what's all the commotion?"

The trio turned to the direction of the voice, to find a menacing man with a whip at his side, and a mischievous face partially obscured by his blue hair. Callie spoke first.

"I don't think that's any of your business…"

The menacing man chuckled. "You're right, it's not. All I'm here for is glory, and I'll take down ANYONE" He steps closer to Harriet, standing so close their faces are almost touching, "who gets in my way. So don't pick a fight with me, and answer my questions. What." He steps closer to Callie.

"Was." He takes a step closer.

"All." Another step.

"The." He's within arm's reach of her.

"Commotion?" His nose is touching Callie's.

Callie draws her sword, and swings at the man. He jumps back, and starts to chuckle, eventually leading into a maniacal laugh. "My, woman today are SO touchy. So violent. Well, it doesn't matter. Soon enough, you'll all be grovelling at my feet."

The man turns, flashes them one last menacing grin, and walks into the guild. Harriet sighs. "What a jerk. Callie, are you okay?"

Callie nods. "I'm… fine."

Vincent looks concerned. "That guy looks like trouble. You girls should stay away from him." Vincent turns away. "Well, it was nice getting to know you two ladies, but I really must be going."

Harriet looks surprised. "Wait, you're not an explorer?"

Vincent has an apologetic look on his face. "Sorry, but I'm just a medic. I'm not cut out for this "exploring" gig. Best of luck to you, though."

Harriet looked concerned. "But, every team needs a medic. We could get hurt…. Who else would be there to heal us?"

Vincent sighed. "Look… it's real nice of you to try and get me on your team, but I really shouldn't-"

"Well look who it is…"

"H-Huh?"

Vincent turned, only to find the very same girl that he argued with. Her Pink hair was tied in twirly pigtails, and she seemed to be wearing all leather. She sported a cocky grin. "Well, you girls here to register? What a coincidence. So are we, right guys?"

Vincent looked over her guild. There was a young man with blonde hair, who seemed to be a Protector. Next to him was a girl with black hair tied in a ponytail, holding a katana. Vincent guessed she was a Ronin. Behind them was a young girl with a hood, and dark grey hair tied in pigtails, who looked to be a hexer. Lastly was an intense looking man with black hair, and an armored glove on one hand. He looked like an Alchemist.

The Haughty girl in pink pigtails seemed to be the leader. "Oh, how rude… We haven't even introduced ourselves. Well, you can call me Sheryl. The blond boy's name is Leon. The Ronin's name is Yin. The young girl's name is Absinthe, but we just call her Abby. Lastly, that's Mikail. He doesn't talk much. Now, you HAVE to introduce me to your guild. I believe it was called… The Etrian Guild?

Vincent winced. "Y-Yes… Of course. My name is… Vincent. These girls are named Callie and Harriet. And our other members are... inside, getting everything, uhh… sorted. They'll... prefer to introduce themselves. In fact… I'll go fetch them!"

(Line break)

The Man in the eyepatch sighed. "So… let me get this straight. Your name is Miles, and you want to start a guild all by yourself?"

"Yessir." replied Miles.

"Look, when you couldn't find the guild, even though it was right in front of you, I knew you were a little slow, but this is crazy. You'll get yourself killed. You need at least 4 more guild members before you can even stand a chance."

Miles thought to himself. Then he nodded. "Very well, where does one find these… "Guild members""?

The man in the eyepatch rolled his eye. "They're everywhere. Everyone and their mom wants to be the 'conqueror of Yggdrasil'. Go outside, walk around a bit. You'll find explorers left and right. Got that? Come back when you've got a party of… let's say 5. That's a good number. Not too many, not too few. Got that?"

Miles bowed. "Thank you sir." He turned to leave, but then he heard a voice.

"OK Move it! Out of the way! Important person coming through! Alrighty… You, cyclops! I need a guild!"

Miles looked at the man who, quite rudely, cut in line. He had a sort of shifty look to him, and he carried a whip.

"He must be a Dark Hunter" Miles thought to himself.

The man in an eyepatch sighed. "Again? Look, I can only take so many idiots in one day! You want a guild, go make one! Start with that guy" He pointed towards Miles, "He's looking for a guild just like you."

"Huh..?" The menacing guy looked at Miles, and came close. So close, in fact, that their noses were almost touching. With a quizzical look on his face, asked "You want a guild, huh?"

Miles was feeling a bit uncomfortable, but he managed to nod.

The menacing man leaned back and looked over Miles, seemingly judging him. After about a minute, he finally spoke. "Alright, you pass. I'm Kell, a Dark Hunter. Good to meetcha."

Miles, rather stiffly, said "I'm Miles. A Landsknecht. Likewise."

Just then, Vincent came rushing in, and noticed the two men standing side by side. Kell looked annoyed. "...Oh, it's you. What do you want?"

Vincent looked a bit panicked. "I… Need your help. You too." He looked at Miles. "Just… come with me. Please." He rushed out

Kell looked smug, as he walked for the exit. "Oh, does this little prissy need our help? What kind of gentlemen would we be if we said- GAAAAAHHH!" Kell got a panicked look on his face, as he hid behind the doorway.

"What's wrong?" Asked Miles.

"N-N-N-Nothing… It's just that… I… uhhhhh… Knew one of those people."

"What? Come now, reunions are always happy occasions! Let's go."

Kell protested a lot, but Miles proved to be stronger. He picked up Kell, and walked outside the door.

"H-H-Hi there, Sheryl… How are you doing?"

Sheryl took one look at Kell, and burst out laughing. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU… ACTUALLY BROUGHT THIS LOSER WITH YOU?!"

Kell tensed up. "It's… nice to see you too… Sheryl…"

After a full minute of guffaws, Sheryl finally calmed down. "Well… I suppose in a way, it's rather fitting. The reject, and a sissy boy medic. You two deserve each other. Although…" She eyes Miles. "You ain't half bad. What's your name?"

Miles raised an eyebrow. "My name is Miles, and I would appreciate it if you didn't mock my guildmate."

Sheryl snorted. "'Your guildmate'? This guy? Well, in the interest of full disclosure, you should know that this bum has been rejected from every single guild in the county. It wasn't till he was ditched in the middle of nowhere that he got the idea to start his own guild. And if this:" She gestured to Vincent, Callie, and Harriet, "Was the best he could do, then I don't think we need to worry about him. Toodle loo, Etrian."

Sheryl walked away, taking her guild with her. Kell kept looking down while he spoke. "Well, there you have it."

Harriet looked concerned. "Are you… okay?"

Once Sheryl was out of earshot, Kell looked up, with a mischievous grin. "Stupid bitch…"

Harriet looked stunned. "Ex-cuse me?"

Kell chuckled. "Oh no no, not you. I mean that pink haired bimbo that acts all high and mighty. Thanks for your concern, but it's far from necessary. No need to worry about little old me. I quit all those guilds. I came to realize that I'm simply too talented for all those guilds, so… I quit. But now… Correct me if I'm wrong, but there's five of us here, is there not?"

Miles looked over the group. "I suppose there is…"

Kell chuckled. "And we're all explorers…"

Vincent adopted a thinking pose. "We are, aren't we?"

Harriet looked excited. "Are you all thinking what I'm thinking?!"

Callie looked bored. "If you all are thinking that we should form a guild of our own then I think that they are thinking what you're thinking."

Kell raised an eyebrow. "Well, I think I speak for everyone when I say that was what I was thinking. So… New guild. Who's in?"

"I'm in."

"Callie and I are totally in!"

"I may not be the fighting type, but I'll heal whoever gets hurt."

Kell smirked. "Perfect then, just try not to slow me down. Today marks the creation of…. Uh… We need a guild name."

"Uhhh… What about 'The Etrian Guild'?

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 **I know the Etrian Odyssey community is lacking in the fanfiction department, but I figured, "What the hell?" Oh, and if you want to know what the characters look like:**

 **Miles is the third sprite option for Landsknecht.**

 **Kell is the first option for Dark Hunter.**

 **Vincent is the third option for Medic.**

 **Callie is the second option for Protector.**

 **Harriet is the second option for Survivalist.**

 **Sheryl is the fourth option for Dark Hunter.**

 **Leon is the first option for Protector.**

 **Mikail is the first option for Alchemist.**

 **Absinthe is the second option for Hexer.**

 **Yin is the second option for Ronin.**


End file.
